How my awful birth turned into the most incredible gift!


After an incredibly traumatic birth with my son, my world fell apart.

I’d been a HypnoBirthing Practitioner for many years by that point and felt totally ready for a beautiful birth. I’d done amazing preparation. I’d learnt how to relax deeply. I’d cleared my fears. And truth be told, I was really really looking forward to welcoming my special little person into this world in a gentle home water birth.

Well…the Universe had other ideas for me!

What I couldn’t have even begun to have planned for though, was what was going on around me that I didn’t have any control over.

Let me explain…my husband (now ex) and I had spent many of our years together building our businesses. I was supporting women with deep emotional tools for motherhood and he was setting up a healthy fast food restaurant. It had taken 5 long years for him to secure a restaurant site but he had finally been able to raise the hundreds of thousands of pounds needed and opened in October 2008. Yes, that’s right, just a few short weeks after Lehman Brothers crashed and the recession hit.

I went into labour on the 22nd February 2009. My mum had arrived the day before and I’d kept thinking that my baby would be early so this felt incredible! I breathed through contractions through the night but by early morning they had subsided. This was no big deal. I knew that my body was just preparing for what was to come.

But then my husband realised that the restaurant wasn’t making enough money. Things grew pretty dire pretty fast and within a few days it was clear we were going to lose everything. And I mean everything!

So my body stayed in this weird pattern of labour for almost 3 weeks!

Yes, you read that right. I experienced 3 weeks of what is called prodromal labour. There were times when I was having contractions 3-4 minutes apart for 7-8 hours at a time but come morning, it would all disappear.

I started to feel increasingly impatient as well as exhausted. Yes, I could’ve just gone in and been induced but I didn’t want that. I wanted my baby to come in his own time and as long as neither of us were distressed then my midwife was happy for us to wait.

It was a mess. One big giant hideous mess!

I eventually gave birth by C-Section on the 12th March after 27 hours of full blown labour where I’d thrown up on every single contraction.